Awkward moments

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TheOtherDude
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Re: Awkward moments

Postby TheOtherDude » Wed Jun 21, 2017 10:47 am

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Re: Awkward moments

Postby Shardik » Wed Jun 21, 2017 9:23 pm

This happened last year, and it's not dildo or even very sex-related, but it was pretty awkward. I went out on a date with a cute girl way younger than my decrepitude deserves. She was into amateur and experimental theater (among lots and lots of other hobbies) and for our first date we went to a burlesque show with "The X-Files" as its theme. One dance, El Chupacabra, featured a male dancer in wild body paint gyrating animalistically around the stage. Toward the end of the music, someone backstage pushed a stuffed sheep onto the floor and he descended on it with his teeth. When he pulled away, he had strands of red ribbon and coils of red and purple yarn between his teeth.

For our second date, we went to a little experimental underground theater showing four shorts, parts of larger plays that local playwrights were trying to get off the ground. None of them were particularly good, although the last and longest, a "feminist" take on Red Riding Hood, had one very nicely choreographed chant & dance piece of a pack of wolves. One scene in the Red Riding Hood part had the wolf (here a werewolf) transform and attack his human sister, "killing" her. As the actress lay on the ground, the wolf actor bit into a part of her costume and away came red ribbon and coils of red and purple yarn. As we left the theater, I told her "I'm going to pick the next thing, and it won't involve entrails." She heartily agreed.

For our third date, I picked something completely safe. We went to see Zootopia.
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Re: Awkward moments

Postby Rainbow Dasher » Thu Jun 22, 2017 1:15 am

Fush wrote:Heres to hoping the office doesn't call me up over it. They are looking for a reason to get rid of me before my lease is up so :(


They can't evict you for having sex toys, it'd be illegal and downright scummy of them.
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Re: Awkward moments

Postby TheOtherDude » Thu Jun 22, 2017 6:07 am

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Re: Awkward moments

Postby Kiran » Thu Jun 22, 2017 6:19 am

TheOtherDude wrote:
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Maybe you can start a discussion like that? It might be solving everything

"Hey mom, last time when you came for the window when I was not there, you did not see anything that is intriguing you? Something like that?" Then drop your Chance on the table :stick:


You will get the discussion you seems to want with her!
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Re: Awkward moments

Postby TheOtherDude » Thu Jun 22, 2017 6:40 am

Kiran wrote:Maybe you can start a discussion like that? It might be solving everything

"Hey mom, last time when you came for the window when I was not there, you did not see anything that is intriguing you? Something like that?" Then drop your Chance on the table :stick:


You will get the discussion you seems to want with her!


While this does sound ridiculous and sure will get me this discussion, as said I'd really prefer her walking up to me and not the other way round. Puts me in a better position, so to say, or at least I'd feel a little more comfortable this way.

We're probably going to have a few drinks this evening. It's freaking hot here these days. She can't get enough of the Mojitos I mix and even brought a fresh supply of booze and the other stuff you need for it despite her general stance I should buy my booze myself :P That could be an opportunity for her.

Time to play the waiting game.
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Re: Awkward moments

Postby Kiran » Thu Jun 22, 2017 6:48 am

TheOtherDude wrote:We're probably going to have a few drinks this evening. It's freaking hot here these days. She can't get enough of the Mojitos I mix and even brought a fresh supply of booze and the other stuff you need for it despite her general stance I should buy my booze myself :P That could be an opportunity for her.

Time to play the waiting game.


But sometime you might need to help the waiting game :stick: Try to bring the discussion that way without being direct, kind of a trap game, and then she will fall in the trap? Don't know how you can do it, but using alcool to remove some barriers might help, but you might need to open, however small it is, the talk about it. Anyway, keep us informed how it went!
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Re: Awkward moments

Postby None » Thu Jun 22, 2017 9:42 am

Just don't mention the war! :stick:
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Re: Awkward moments

Postby TheOtherDude » Thu Jun 22, 2017 9:55 am

None wrote:Just don't mention the war! :stick:


Throwing back silicone dongs since 5:45am? :laugh:

Anyway, I think I'm going to go with a milder variation of your suggestion tonight, Kiran.
Will report results.
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Re: Awkward moments

Postby None » Thu Jun 22, 2017 10:31 am

TheOtherDude wrote:[...]
Anyway, I think I'm going to go with a milder variation of your suggestion tonight, Kiran.
Will report results.


Good luck
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Re: Awkward moments

Postby TheOtherDude » Thu Jun 22, 2017 5:35 pm

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Re: Awkward moments

Postby Wistala » Thu Jun 22, 2017 8:06 pm

Nice. Grats on the discussion seemingly going well.

My own discussion with my mom 4 years ago didn't go as well as yours did :eyeroll:

She seemed to somehow think that the Janine I got (was my first and only toy at the time I talked to her about it) was sexist and an attack on women??? No idea where the hell that came from, as she's normally quite progressive. We came to a 'don't ask don't tell' agreement on it.

Over time I've slowly put stuff just up on display in my computer room, lol. I've got a Large Giraffe Tongue on a shelf, a Dragon Muzzle on another shelf, and a Vixen hanging from a wall shelf support (in its black bag, to be fair).

I think she's evolved her stance over time and become much more accepting.
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Re: Awkward moments

Postby None » Thu Jun 22, 2017 8:13 pm

TheOtherDude wrote:[...]


Dang, I was rotating in my grave* when reading this :bugeyed:

I'm glad I live alone and don't have to explain my sexuality to anybody :widesmile:
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Re: Awkward moments

Postby TheOtherDude » Thu Jun 22, 2017 11:15 pm

I'm just happy finally having it out of the way.
It's even easier as we aren't going to see each other for a couple of weeks, so the topic has enough time to really settle with her while guaranteed to not be immediately confronted with it again.
Will be interesting to see how it goes when she's back home.

Wistala wrote:Nice. Grats on the discussion seemingly going well.

My own discussion with my mom 4 years ago didn't go as well as yours did :eyeroll:

She seemed to somehow think that the Janine I got (was my first and only toy at the time I talked to her about it) was sexist and an attack on women??? No idea where the hell that came from, as she's normally quite progressive. We came to a 'don't ask don't tell' agreement on it.

Over time I've slowly put stuff just up on display in my computer room, lol. I've got a Large Giraffe Tongue on a shelf, a Dragon Muzzle on another shelf, and a Vixen hanging from a wall shelf support (in its black bag, to be fair).

I think she's evolved her stance over time and become much more accepting.


The first thing I was thinking when reading this... how can one that thinks vagina clones are sexist not think dick clones are also sexist? It's essentially the same thing :psyduck:
But don't ask don't tell is still much better than some of the horror stories I've read here I think, with parents demanding these things immediately leave the house, or going in by themselves and taking everything they can find to the trash, etc.

Hmm, displaying stuff... I really want to as well, but there's still my dad who is unprepared and he is going to be left that way until absolutely necessary (he is a bit harder to handle, but usually just doesn't give a fuck about anything anyway, just he is absent-minded very often and enters without knocking), so I'm not 100% sure yet. Maybe I'll start with putting Fenrir on display on a shelf that can't be seen from the room entrance first. Definitely want to put up Chance as well though which is just too long/high for any suitable shelf I have...

None wrote:I'm glad I live alone and don't have to explain my sexuality to anybody :widesmile:


Some day... Well, it's not too bad after all to live with them. My dad isn't quite as easy to handle as my mom but all in all they both really are great in just letting me do my thing :P

Since I don't have a GF and neither have visitors particularly often, it's really just getting problematic sometimes with "shared resources" and thin walls/doors and loud sounds. But all in all we get along well, way better than anything I used to hear from my former school mates back when I was still at school.

Could imagine though that even you are going to have to tell some day... I could imagine even the most open and accepting girlfriend is sure going to have some questions after stumbling upon one's collection when it doesn't solely consist of classic men's toys...
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Re: Awkward moments

Postby None » Fri Jun 23, 2017 3:11 am

TheOtherDude wrote:[...]


I don't worry about things like that. I have neither interest nor intention to be with someone and I've cut off most contact with my family. Also, It's nobody's business what I put inside of me but my own :smile:
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Re: Awkward moments

Postby Kiran » Tue Jun 27, 2017 1:41 pm

TheOtherDude wrote:Could imagine though that even you are going to have to tell some day... I could imagine even the most open and accepting girlfriend is sure going to have some questions after stumbling upon one's collection when it doesn't solely consist of classic men's toys...

I'm glad and went well for you!

The awkward moment with the girlfriend might happen by forcing things on my side... I told her that I like anal sex and told her I wanted to show her my toy one day and she told me thant it does not interest her. But she don't know that I now have a David though, so I might leave it in the open when she will be visiting me... But it will must surely turn her off, that is what she was saying me...

Or for some of my friends I might show it just in case I forget to store it one day, but I'm more the type to be "what happen in my bedroom stays there" except for some very close friends... It's more awkward for other people to find out than for you I think, I would only be "I like that, so what? Wanna see more? I can show you my collection!" :stick: Once people know, I'm easily more open minded to discuss...
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Re: Awkward moments

Postby Fush » Tue Jun 27, 2017 1:57 pm

So I was having a web cam date with my boyfriend and he saw one of my toy's I forgot to move out of view so my small secret is out. I was waiting till it was the right time to tell him I have dragon, tentacle, and other fantasy toy's. I knew he was okay with them but I didn't want him know exactly what I had yet. So after he learned what I had and what they look like. He told me he was ordering me another one of his choice lol so here I don't know what I'm getting lol. It's kind of awkward because I half don't like gifts and its a gift of a dick of some sort.

I mean it was actually pretty fun to discuss fantasy dildos and they they might feel. He does know I'm texture insensitive so he did suggest I go the more girth route instead because it might end up being more satisfying. And while on the subject he told me his fantasy of being done by me anally which was actually kind of unexpected because he didn't seem like the type. So knowing about toys in a relationship is quite important. It can help spice things up to the next level. Thats how I see it based on the little event. Now it's going to bug me to figure out which one he's sending me. I kind of hope he doesn't send the XL Chance flared like he been joking. I wouldn't know what to do with it.
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Re: Awkward moments

Postby Kiran » Tue Jun 27, 2017 2:11 pm

Fush wrote: I wouldn't know what to do with it.

Try it on him :stick: More seriously I'm with you on knowing about toys and what you like so that your relationship might go to another level.
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Re: Awkward moments

Postby ImagineToothless » Fri Jun 30, 2017 9:21 pm

DaedraQueen wrote:So, so far I've just lurked and laughed at some of these posts and I just knew that eventually I would one day have to post my own. Well todays my day!

So I've been waiting patiently :unamused: for my King of monsters to arrive along with my new top and the UPS delivery says between 1-3pm so I look at the clock and see 10:30 and go yay I can clean the house and my toys before he arrives, about an hour later I've got everything cleaned all my BD'S are in boiling soapy water and after they are done I pile them into my box narrowly catching flint as he falls off the side of said box when I hear the doorbell ring!

MY STUFFS HERE! I say happily as I throw the box on the bed and rush to get it I open the door and the UPS guy who i am on first name basis on smiles one second and then double takes, Now I'm not vain in any sense of the word, But I thought I looked very pretty in my Yellow sundress maybe the pushup bra was a bit much but hell each to there own I have boobs I grew them myself Im pretty proud of them.

So he's looking everywhere but me passes me the box and all but turns and leaves, It isn't till I've closed the door and hoisted the box up that I realised the cause of his discomfort.

I'M STILL HOLDING FLINT IN MY HAND LIKE A FUCKING STRESS BALL OF DRAGON DICK PROPORTIONS!

and what do I do in my moment of stupidity I open the door and YELL down the balcony at him 'SORRY FOR SHOWING YOU MY DICK!'

Please kill me now! Kill the UPS guy leave no evidence other than this post I'm going to hug all my dicks and die under the couch!
:crying: :crying: :crying:

HAHAHAHAHA oh my god. This is like 1000% something I would do.
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Re: Awkward moments

Postby DaedraQueen » Fri Jun 30, 2017 9:33 pm

ImagineToothless wrote:
DaedraQueen wrote:So, so far I've just lurked and laughed at some of these posts and I just knew that eventually I would one day have to post my own. Well todays my day!

So I've been waiting patiently :unamused: for my King of monsters to arrive along with my new top and the UPS delivery says between 1-3pm so I look at the clock and see 10:30 and go yay I can clean the house and my toys before he arrives, about an hour later I've got everything cleaned all my BD'S are in boiling soapy water and after they are done I pile them into my box narrowly catching flint as he falls off the side of said box when I hear the doorbell ring!

MY STUFFS HERE! I say happily as I throw the box on the bed and rush to get it I open the door and the UPS guy who i am on first name basis on smiles one second and then double takes, Now I'm not vain in any sense of the word, But I thought I looked very pretty in my Yellow sundress maybe the pushup bra was a bit much but hell each to there own I have boobs I grew them myself Im pretty proud of them.

So he's looking everywhere but me passes me the box and all but turns and leaves, It isn't till I've closed the door and hoisted the box up that I realised the cause of his discomfort.

I'M STILL HOLDING FLINT IN MY HAND LIKE A FUCKING STRESS BALL OF DRAGON DICK PROPORTIONS!

and what do I do in my moment of stupidity I open the door and YELL down the balcony at him 'SORRY FOR SHOWING YOU MY DICK!'

Please kill me now! Kill the UPS guy leave no evidence other than this post I'm going to hug all my dicks and die under the couch!
:crying: :crying: :crying:

HAHAHAHAHA oh my god. This is like 1000% something I would do.


There has been contact since then! He apologised he had been told that they (BD toys) existed but he didnt know to that extent but he was sweet and now has small talk when he brings me stuff!
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