Has BD ruined you for regular sex?

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SierraFox
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Re: Has BD ruined you for regular sex?

Postby SierraFox » Sun Feb 14, 2016 1:44 pm

Put down another tally for a sex life improved by Bad Dragon! The BF is on the big size in terms of what he's packing while I'm pretty petite, so while sex was usually pretty great 80% of the time, the other 20% could get reallyyyyy painful if I wasn't turned on enough, didn't get enough foreplay or whatever. Bringing BD into the bedroom allowed me to experiment and learn a bit more about what I like, and I even discovered that the elusive vaginal orgasm is actually IS possible for me. Using them has also made me slightly less self-conscious in getting myself off with him (a weird hang-up for some reason).

I won't say I've NEVER passed up my BF in favor of toys, only because it's not uncommon for us to toy together if we've had a long day and just want to relax and get off without the acrobatics. Sometimes you just can't beat putting on some porn and kicking back and getting down. He's into anal play and has a couple penetrables so there's no jealously or anything over it.

Keep in mind I don't tend to pursue a stretching sensation vaginally like a lot of users here do. I'm pretty content with minis to mediums and longer lengths rather than girth. I'm not the size queen type, and go for overall feel rather than sheer mass. My BF's dick does have a very pronounced upward curve that no toy can mimic, and add to that the feel of authentic skin on skin, all the sounds and smells and sights that come with partnered sex and thats still by far my favorite sensation, as relaxing and chill as toying together can be.

The only downside to BD is that I sometimes find myself wishing he had a knot because I have a newfound love for the mental aspect of tying. But... I guess that's why we have a wereable! :widesmile:
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Re: Has BD ruined you for regular sex?

Postby HedonismButt » Sun Feb 14, 2016 5:53 pm

karla-chan wrote:If I am making sense?

Definitely. I hope I can incorporate toys into my sex life with my next partner. It all sounds like a lot of fun. Enriches the whole experience, giving you something else to share, other ways to make each other feel good.
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Re: Has BD ruined you for regular sex?

Postby HedonismButt » Sun Feb 14, 2016 6:01 pm

SierraFox wrote:Put down another tally for a sex life improved by Bad Dragon! The BF is on the big size in terms of what he's packing while I'm pretty petite, so while sex was usually pretty great 80% of the time, the other 20% could get reallyyyyy painful if I wasn't turned on enough, didn't get enough foreplay or whatever. Bringing BD into the bedroom allowed me to experiment and learn a bit more about what I like, and I even discovered that the elusive vaginal orgasm is actually IS possible for me. Using them has also made me slightly less self-conscious in getting myself off with him (a weird hang-up for some reason).

I won't say I've NEVER passed up my BF in favor of toys, only because it's not uncommon for us to toy together if we've had a long day and just want to relax and get off without the acrobatics. Sometimes you just can't beat putting on some porn and kicking back and getting down. He's into anal play and has a couple penetrables so there's no jealously or anything over it.

Keep in mind I don't tend to pursue a stretching sensation vaginally like a lot of users here do. I'm pretty content with minis to mediums and longer lengths rather than girth. I'm not the size queen type, and go for overall feel rather than sheer mass. My BF's dick does have a very pronounced upward curve that no toy can mimic, and add to that the feel of authentic skin on skin, all the sounds and smells and sights that come with partnered sex and thats still by far my favorite sensation, as relaxing and chill as toying together can be.

The only downside to BD is that I sometimes find myself wishing he had a knot because I have a newfound love for the mental aspect of tying. But... I guess that's why we have a wereable! :widesmile:

First of all, that fox is so flippin' adorable, I wanna bite it. Second of all, that's great that BD has done that for you. Everyone's stories and thoughts have been very enlightening.
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Re: Has BD ruined you for regular sex?

Postby karla-chan » Mon Feb 15, 2016 1:23 am

HedonismButt wrote:
karla-chan wrote:If I am making sense?

Definitely. I hope I can incorporate toys into my sex life with my next partner. It all sounds like a lot of fun. Enriches the whole experience, giving you something else to share, other ways to make each other feel good.


Pretty much yeah, since on average it takes longer for a woman to climax so toys can really help. So hopefully your next partner will be willing.
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Re: Has BD ruined you for regular sex?

Postby Tempest » Tue Feb 16, 2016 6:05 pm

Short answer: no

Slightly longer answer: like a few other posters in this thread, I find that toys need to be more impressive than a human penis to make up for the fact that there isn't a person attached.

More nuanced answer: toys and sex fulfill a lot of the same needs, but it's not entirely the same. Solo toy use is still masturbation, which means it follows different rules from sex. When sex is what I want, it's a poor substitute. But sometimes I want to take care of my own needs without having to make sure another person is also having a good time too.
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Re: Has BD ruined you for regular sex?

Postby Amaranthe » Tue Feb 16, 2016 6:22 pm

I'm in the "sex life improved" category as well!
As most others have already said, toys are a way for me to explore and try new things. They are fun, but they could never be a replacement for sex. For me, that's mainly because of the emotional element. And since I started trying out toys, regular sex has gotten more comfortable for me! Toying also helps me discover new things that I like, and I can share that with my mate. Also, we enjoy using toys together.
So, it's been a rather good improvement to my sexual health overall! :widesmile:
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Re: Has BD ruined you for regular sex?

Postby Shardik » Tue Feb 16, 2016 8:12 pm

HedonismButt wrote:It's a serious but possibly dumb question that's been rattling around in my head for a while now. I've just noticed that BD's insertable toys are much larger than your average human male, and that's just compared to some of the smalls. Human males are obviously outclassed when it comes to the larger sizes that a lot of people seem to gravitate toward. ... I feel like with even just that, whenever it is that I do have sex with a man, it won't be as good?


No... and yes. No because there's a megafrackton more to sex than just getting your hole filled. A lot more. I've been kinky and pan my entire life, and I'm 50 (fuck's sake, how did that happen?), and I've done hardcore S&M (piercing, flogging, whips, the whole kit and caboodle) and I've been into my butt pretty much since puberty (man, 1978 seems so far away...), and I've been into megaoverloadbig toys since my late college days.

Nothing is better than getting into bed with another human being. Even threesomes aren't nearly as interesting as just having someone, just one other person, to look into the eyes, to kiss and hold and just give yourself to, or to accept the gift of their body for yourself. Nothing is better than fucking. And oh, gods, there is nothing more amazing than being fucked. You look up into his eyes (or hers, if she's into strap-ons), and that feral grin, that hard edge, that gleam, that look of lost concentration as they fuck you, as the sensations wash through you, as you realize that that person gets off on you, that person is into you, that person finds you so hot he's going to come inside you.

Fuck me, nothing's better than that. Even, le sigh, in the age of condoms.

On the other paw, I do have friends I hang out with for "technical" sex; we're into fisting and massive dildos and Crisco and J-lube; we do it because it's edgy and fun and it feels good. And I haven't had that intense emotional bond in those occasions, because we were there for other reasons, for just getting off, using one another as advanced, delightful, and frankly quite delighted, masturbatory toys. I love topping at those times just as much as bottoming. I love the feeling of a big hairy paw filling my guts, or a big bear of man strapping on a Large Flint and fucking me brainless. It's not the same as just being alone with someone, but it's powerful.

Comparing the two experiences is a bit like comparing apples and hand grenades. Both have amazing power, but you wouldn't keep them in the same place on your kitchen counter.
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Re: Has BD ruined you for regular sex?

Postby Aether » Tue Feb 16, 2016 8:44 pm

I couldn't tell you for sure since I haven't experienced sex with a partner, but I can definitely say that toys have made life harder for other people, not me. Namely, any and all of the guys I wasn't attracted to, but who were attracted to me. :stick:

I've been asked for casual things and as a demisexual with a small armada of silicone dicks, I couldn't help but laugh. There's nothing a casual fling offers me. I don't risk pregnancy with my silicone boys, I can get off every time, and I also don't risk being alone with someone I don't know well and don't have an attachment to.

If I'm going to take risks, make myself start using contraception and all of that, it has to be for someone I really care about. I don't think my toys will ruin me when it comes to that special person. I mean, I have toys as big as a Large Moko and Large David, and the girth on the Mountain Drake is impressive, but my favorite for a quickie is a small Fenrir and a tiny bullet vibe! I am pretty sure that any man who takes a few seconds to listen to what I like and where, will not have the slightest problem getting me off.

Plus, that whole idea of love and being loved, looking into someone's eyes and knowing that the other person finds you totally irresistible... that gets me going in ways no toy does. I'm not worried about the toys.

I'm much more worried about finding someone I trust enough to become attracted to them in the first place. I'll worry about the role of my silicone slabs when I find the right man!
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Re: Has BD ruined you for regular sex?

Postby Juneberry » Tue Feb 16, 2016 10:21 pm

Not at all. :D As much as I love my toys, none of them come close to being as satisfying as sex with my boyfriend. We've even used them together a couple times
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Re: Has BD ruined you for regular sex?

Postby HedonismButt » Wed Feb 17, 2016 2:35 am

Shardik wrote: :words:

That was so fucking eloquent. I want to print out that little speech and put it on my wall. It had everything. Thank you, sir.
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Re: Has BD ruined you for regular sex?

Postby Shadow hound » Wed Feb 17, 2016 10:29 am

Nope. I will take the real thing anytime over silicone dicks, no matter how pretty they are :D

Sometimes when I use a big toy to stretch myself out and THEN have real sex after it, the sex feels amazing cause my ladybits are still tingling from the big toy stretch so it actually enhances the feeling of the real penis as well, penising intensifies to the max. I love it :)

I'm so glad my fiancee has nothing against massive dragon dicks xD
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Re: Has BD ruined you for regular sex?

Postby Raya » Wed Feb 17, 2016 3:36 pm

Goliogon wrote:Sadly, I seem to enjoy toys more than actual sex, and it's horribly disappointing and upsetting. :doh:

This is what my mate is DEATHLY afraid of when it comes to my toys.....
He practically HATES my toys, 3 reasons.
1: He has low self confidence when it comes to how his dick is going to pleasure me when we meet (in a long distance relationship and havent met irl yet) and he even says thats why he doesnt like my toys.
2: He thinks the bigger my toys are and the more I use them the more "open" Im going to be when he can finally come down to see me. Hes the kind of guy who says the tighter the better which I am. When I got my Varka and he saw the size of his he fucking lost it. I cant even use my Varka due to me being too tight. :eyeroll: HENCE WHY IN JUNE IM GETTING A MED XER SO I OPEN UP MORE SO I CAN TAKE HIM! :widesmile:
3: That Im going to prefer my toys over him because my toys have textures and because I hate smooth toys so he thinks Im going to he his dick.
Theres ALSO a forth reason the I wont go there... :angry:

I keep having to tell him that due to my puss not being able to feel anything I cant even enjoy my toys like I want unless its my knotted toys anyway and that when the first time I ever had sex my ex was like (same size or smaller) then a Lil Squirt and he somehow managed to find my G-spot, Iv never been able to find it myself but a few times so I tell him as long as he can stretch me and find that stop it'll be all good.

If I dont use my toys for a week or 2 I get back to being super tight again that putting a finger in takes work, and the biggest things Iv had in my V was my 2 knotted toys my med Fenrir and my Orion from Blue Ritual and my small Crackers.
Last edited by Raya on Wed Feb 17, 2016 4:07 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Has BD ruined you for regular sex?

Postby karla-chan » Wed Feb 17, 2016 3:49 pm

I really passionately hate the whole thing about men fussing about how "open/wide" women are going to be, because of other men, or toys etc. Honestly it is a big time peeve of mine.

Since women are not just there for pleasure. It's designed to stretch and go back to normal. So this idea honestly is a myth to prevent women from being as sexually active as men. Also putting so much focus on how tight a woman is, just seems to reduce her value to her genitals.

Guys honestly need to get over the fact women please them selves. Since men do it all the time...
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Re: Has BD ruined you for regular sex?

Postby Rainbow Dasher » Wed Feb 17, 2016 3:54 pm

You can easily stay loose, though not as loose as society wants you to think. I am most definitely looser and I only toy a couple times a month. I don't even feel my husband anymore. I actually prefer my toys to him, but there is a long back story, as to why. Let's just say he's pretty damn close to being asexual and I've recently come to terms that I am a lesbian.

Also, not all men masturbate, all the time. Before I bought my husband a BD penetrable he was curious about, he had never masturbated. Not once in his life. He still, really, doesn't.
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Re: Has BD ruined you for regular sex?

Postby Jasmine » Wed Feb 17, 2016 4:06 pm

I haven't had sex yet, but I've seriously talked about this with my fiance.

I don't have much of a libido. It's not anyone's (or anything's) fault, it just is what it is. When I'm in the mood, I'm in the mood! But generally it's hard to align those moments for when we actually have a chance for intimacy.

We've both agreed that as long as we make the effort for human contact first, it's totally fine if toys end up being added to the equation. There will be days were it'll be easier to him to reach for his Janine and cuddle beside me instead of dealing with the frustration of my libido not being up for that moment. There will be days where I'll want to use a toy with a curve for more focused g-spot play. He has admitted that he's glad that I have a vibrator because it'll help improve our chances of having a mutually satisfying experience.

I guess our experience might be different because he's been consulted on every toy I've purchased and is comfortable with what we have in our toy bin.
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Re: Has BD ruined you for regular sex?

Postby Raya » Wed Feb 17, 2016 4:25 pm

My hate thinks sex isnt that impotent so he doesnt understand who Im ALWAYS in heat. When we get together Im going to want to have fun with him alot but I know hes not, Im lucky if I can get him to play with me on Xbox or on Skype....

karla-chan wrote:I really passionately hate the whole thing about men fussing about how "open/wide" women are going to be, because of other men, or toys etc. Honestly it is a big time peeve of mine.

Since women are not just there for pleasure. It's designed to stretch and go back to normal. So this idea honestly is a myth to prevent women from being as sexually active as men. Also putting so much focus on how tight a woman is, just seems to reduce her value to her genitals.

Guys honestly need to get over the fact women please them selves. Since men do it all the time...

As for him wanting me to stay tight, its my choice too, the thought of me being loss upsets the hell out of me. I LOVE being how tight I am.
Especially since I cant feel inside except for the back and my G-spot when and IF can be found..... the last thing I need is my G-spot being anymore harder to find then it already is. :unamused:
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Re: Has BD ruined you for regular sex?

Postby karla-chan » Wed Feb 17, 2016 10:41 pm

Rainbow Dasher wrote:You can easily stay loose, though not as loose as society wants you to think. I am most definitely looser and I only toy a couple times a month. I don't even feel my husband anymore. I actually prefer my toys to him, but there is a long back story, as to why. Let's just say he's pretty damn close to being asexual and I've recently come to terms that I am a lesbian.

Also, not all men masturbate, all the time. Before I bought my husband a BD penetrable he was curious about, he had never masturbated. Not once in his life. He still, really, doesn't.


Just from my experience those men that have a problem with female masterbation do tend to themselves. Which is my issue with men who seem to take this objection, from my point of view it seems selfish to try and force this on women. I have had seriously negative experiences with a ex partner trying to pull this on me.

Plus I know some friends who have been through hell because of it, and men having this view of "purity" with women. Some men even consider it to be cheating, but in the meantime it's daily for them.

I know not everyone does masterbate, but with men it is less common not to. (Although it being more common in men is nothing to do with drive, but rather social norms). However if he is close to asexual that does explain a lot, but asexuality makes up for something like 1% of the population. If someone chooses not to, that is perfectly fine. It's just I seriously feel that someone's views on masterbation shouldn't be forced on someone else. Either way actually, because I appreciate that the are damaging views towards men too.

I know some women can stay wider for longer, because many do after child birth. Even then not all, after my Mum had two children, she later had a smear that hurt a lot, because she had gone that tight again.

But they are fully designed to stretch. They are just muscles.

Yes the difference in looser muscles, is not as much as society makes out. Plus sometimes it is just a some women take longer to go back to their normal. It does vary a lot, but there are so many myths out their about women's bodies.

Often with a controlling aspect towards women. It's the overly fussing about women's bodies, to stay pleasurable for men I take issue with. Like in some countries they don't let women run to much or jump, in fear that it will "ruin" their virginity. Since people seriously misunderstand how the female body works.

Raya wrote:As for him wanting me to stay tight, its my choice too, the thought of me being loss upsets the hell out of me. I LOVE being how tight I am.
Especially since I cant feel inside except for the back and my G-spot when and IF can be found..... the last thing I need is my G-spot being anymore harder to find then it already is. :unamused:


I'm all for personal choice and all, but honestly partners wanting to be controlling like that is a huge alarm bell. It's your body, your rules. Not something he should have a say in because it is something very personal to yourself.

However be aware of many of the myths about women's bodies, since over worrying about how tight you are is probably not fun for you either. Since if there is a worry about future pleasure there, it can't be fun. There are also ways to strengthen the muscles too, since actually those balls people use for pleasure are actually designed to help with those muscles with pelvic exercises.

Since it can be done. Even after extremes, just how much of an effect and how long it takes varied. It really doesn't go loose in the way society makes out though.
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Re: Has BD ruined you for regular sex?

Postby Rainbow Dasher » Wed Feb 17, 2016 10:48 pm

I've never had a child. The body loses elasticity down there, with age; it's just a normal fact of life. Toying with huge toys probably doesn't help. Yes, vaginas are made to stretch, but there are limits. Yes, a baby passes through that canal, but the majority of women tear during childbirth, requiring stitches because they've ripped themselves, and pretty badly. My mother ripped all the back to her asshole.

It's going to vary by individual, whether or not larger toys makes them stay looser than normal, as well as how large their partner is, as to whether or not feeling them, is diminished in any capacity. In my experience, in just a year I've gone from being able to feel my husband just fine, to his dick feeling little more than like a finger inside of me. So, for me, there have been some pretty big-deal changes.

People who have partners with dicks that are upwards of 8 - 10 inches? You'd have to use something like an XL Flint, daily, in order to be ruined for sex.

Yes, some guys do think women should never touch themselves, and those men (and I use that term loosely) can just plain ol' get fucked.
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Re: Has BD ruined you for regular sex?

Postby karla-chan » Wed Feb 17, 2016 11:04 pm

Rainbow Dasher wrote:I've never had a child. The body loses elasticity down there, with age; it's just a normal fact of life. Toying with huge toys probably doesn't help. Yes, vaginas are made to stretch, but there are limits. Yes, a baby passes through that canal, but the majority of women tear during childbirth, requiring stitches because they've ripped themselves, and pretty badly. My mother ripped all the back to her asshole.

It's going to vary by individual, whether or not larger toys makes them stay looser than normal, as well as how large their partner is, as to whether or not feeling them, is diminished in any capacity. In my experience, in just a year I've gone from being able to feel my husband just fine, to his dick feeling little more than like a finger inside of me. So, for me, there have been some pretty big-deal changes.

People who have partners with dicks that are upwards of 8 - 10 inches? You'd have to use something like an XL Flint, daily, in order to be ruined for sex.

Yes, some guys do think women should never touch themselves, and those men (and I use that term loosely) can just plain ol' get fucked.


I'm not negating your personal experiences, it is mainly the latter I take issue with and am aiming my main points towards. Since it is something I have come across a lot. I know far too many views that think a woman just have more than one guy will make them loose.

I agree age is a factor, because they are just muscles at the end of the day. Which is why like any muscle they can also be strengthened. It is also why variations happen.

Like honestly I can be fisted one day, and the next day my partner would have to start with one finger and work up. Or need lube to make sex even possible, because I really have gone that tight again. Although my body has a separate reason for that.

I also personally toy very frequently too. I will admit if I'm very frequently doing so (like more than daily which I have been known to do) I have less trouble with going too tight for sex and needing lube. However if I didn't touch myself for like a week or something, then my partner would have to take it seriously slow with me.
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Re: Has BD ruined you for regular sex?

Postby Kinky_Condesce » Wed Feb 17, 2016 11:15 pm

Eugh, glad I decided to stick to relatively smaller toys.

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