Medication and Drive/Orgasms: Can anything help?

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Dorito
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Medication and Drive/Orgasms: Can anything help?

Postby Dorito » Tue Nov 15, 2016 7:21 am

For some background, I'm currently on several medications: 200mg Luvox for depression/autism/anxiety, 50mg Naltrexone for OCD/Trich, 1mg Klonopin for severe anxiety days and panic attacks, and 100mg Spironolactone (taken in two 50mg doses a day) for my skin. All taken daily except the Klonopin, and sometimes antispasmodic for my IBS, but I don't think that effects libido.

I feel like I don't want to toy nearly as much as I'd like to, and it really bums me out. My orgasms, if you can even call them that, are usually also very unsatisfying: it reaches a little 'peak' and then it's over like I can't do it anymore (just becomes uncomfortable at that point) and it's so underwhelming and... blegh. I feel like I'm missing out because I hear about these awesome sessions people have and can't help but wonder what the secret is, and I'm really wishing I could have the same enjoyment. :sniffing:

Anyone have advice on making toying better/more effective while on meds?
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Re: Medication and Drive/Orgasms: Can anything help?

Postby mynickname » Tue Nov 15, 2016 12:31 pm

Your best advice is to use this time while the meds are working to improve your life so you can stop taking them.

The others things are all the standard advice for sexual issues. Relax, take your time, get a massage or take a warm bath, don't focus on a goal of orgasm instead just enjoy the journey, do self-reflective meditation, reduce any stresses in your life, eat well, sleep well, etc... There is no right or wrong amount of toying. If your body doesn't feel like toying then reduce your mental expectations to match.

Yoga increases testosterone levels and testosterone increases horniness so you could start doing basic yoga too. Male or female, do pelvic floor exercises too. Stronger muscles in that area will help in stronger contractions and improve your ability to internally focus (focusing meaning like how you weren't thinking of how your ears felt until right now, when you internally focus on your arousal building you can feel it better).
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Re: Medication and Drive/Orgasms: Can anything help?

Postby Rainbow Dasher » Tue Nov 15, 2016 1:31 pm

From my experiences with meds, until I got off of them I had 0 libido and when I did try and toy....it made me feel excruciatingly awful. It took me about 8 months after getting off of them, to get back to some form of normal with my body.

Anti-depressants, anti-anxiety meds and the like generally affect libido, big time. There was a similar thread around, several months back where folks were discussing the same thing, and everyone that commented said the same things: Meds put their desire level to toy, to zero, and nothing changed until the medications were stopped or drastically altered.
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Re: Medication and Drive/Orgasms: Can anything help?

Postby kt~ » Tue Nov 15, 2016 2:23 pm

I'm not on meds now, but last december - this march, I was on lexapro (started on 5 mg, got up to 15 mg before stopping).

At first, it definitely had an impact on toying, it made my genitals feel numb. But then after about a month, everything returned to normal, even though I was still taking the meds :mystery:

But once I got to a 15 mg dose I started getting other bad effects (really bad nausea, waking up multiple times during the night). So I stopped taking it, it didn't help anyway. The bad side effects actually made it harder to function and do my homework than depression does.

SSRIs are really well known for the sexual side effects. I don't know if there's a way to get rid of them except maybe you could try other meds to see if you could find one that doesn't give you the side effect.
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Re: Medication and Drive/Orgasms: Can anything help?

Postby Feliciaty » Tue Nov 15, 2016 2:52 pm

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But what I'm saying is that perhaps you should plan when you want to toy and set a marked date for it (perhaps a day you don't work or do anything really). Just probably write it down as 'stress relief day' then perhaps wait until after you toy to take your meds? Of course I have no idea how severe your depression/anxiety/autism is so perhaps it's not a good idea. But that's pretty much my advice.

Do you have trouble getting aroused at all too due to your meds or are you able to get in the mood? Forcing yourself to get into it isn't a good thing either. It could actually lessen your pleasure and your orgasms thus making it a pretty dull session. It's best to be completely in the mood before going for it.
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Re: Medication and Drive/Orgasms: Can anything help?

Postby Mettaton » Tue Nov 15, 2016 3:45 pm

I am presently on Zoloft and Cymbalta and have another meeting with my Psychiatrist to determine where to go next with the medicine because this isn't working for me. (they added Cymbalta to the mix when I was in the hospital)

It's worth noting that sex came into my life as a form of abuse and punishment. The first time I had "sex" it was a violent occurrence. I believe that those 2 years of abuse is why I am having this issues now, and why this is so hard for me. To this day, when I try to arouse myself, there's always a touch of panic in the back of my mind (even 10 years after the violence) my body perceives arousal as a form of anxiety, and the medication is like "shh shh calm down" and it takes the drive away.

As of now, with both medications, it is impossible for me to just "become" aroused. I have to seek it out and commit to it. It is almost a chore, but when I am all through I am glad I went through the effort. The BD toys have helped me, because I am able to focus on my own mental fantasies rather than seeking out things to look at while using a vibrator. Most of the things I would seek out were self depreciating and the orgasm didn't really bring about good feelings afterwards.

Today I was fortunate to have an excellent toying session and come to orgasm. I was able to relax and get into it by:

1) Knowing and affirming that I was safe where I was. I had to tell myself that no one was going to come in and hurt me.
2) Starting with smaller toys, and working my way up as needed. This allowed my body to get stimulated and respond to certain toys, relax, and allow other toys to work their way in.
3) Not focusing on what -I- was doing, rather, focusing on what I wanted to imagine was being done to me. Feeling like I am "fucking myself" brings me out of the mood. So instead, I tried to imagine a position I wanted to be in and really committed to that fantasy.
4) Going into it with no pressure or time limit. If I didn't have an orgasm, that would've been fine. No one was scheduled to come into the home at any time, and I wasn't going to answer the phone. I slated that time for -me- to play with -myself- without their being a deadline for when I needed to be done.

Sometimes I can tell that when I toy, I am not going to have an orgasm. And that's okay. I just hope to make the sexual experiences more relaxing and fun rather than anxiety provoking. I still have a hard time being sexual with my partner, but I hope therapy will help with that.
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Re: Medication and Drive/Orgasms: Can anything help?

Postby Jasmine » Tue Nov 15, 2016 5:50 pm

I recently went off my hormonal birth control in the hopes of it helping my libido. We were using condoms regularly anyways, so it was a pretty simple decision for us for me to try going off the pill to see if that's what made my sex drive plummet.

I totally get what you mean though, it totally plateaus instead of building into an orgasm.

Talk to your psychiatrist about your side effects, see if they think a SNRI would be a better fit for you. They have less sexual side effects than SSRIs, due to the neurotransmitter they target. An example of an SNRI is Wellbutrin (Bupropion).

Otherwise right now I'm trying to make sure I'm getting enough zinc, magnesium, and iron in my diet, which I read about on some crunchy blog somewhere. No clue if they'll actually do anything, but I figure it can't hurt to try.
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Re: Medication and Drive/Orgasms: Can anything help?

Postby Tempest » Tue Nov 15, 2016 6:08 pm

Much sympathy. In my case, I pretty much lost the ability to orgasm while on SSRIs. That never went away, so I switched to Wellbutrin. That may or may not be an option for you, since you're taking the SSRI for multiple different conditions and I don't think Wellbutrin is prescribed to treat all of them. Some doctors prescribe Wellbutrin alongside SSRIs to lessen the side effects though, and I know a couple of people who tried that and told me that while it didn't solve the whole problem, it did help.

The spironolactone is another one that will hit your sex drive especially hard since it's an anti-androgen. Depending on the specific symptoms you're taking it to treat, a cream might have fewer side effects than pills while still getting you the results you need.
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Re: Medication and Drive/Orgasms: Can anything help?

Postby Dorito » Wed Nov 16, 2016 12:14 am

These replies didn't appear in my messages for some reason, so sorry everyone for the late response! :doh:

I unfortunately don't think I can really go off my medications, including skipping doses. I might be able to switch the Luvox for something else, but other than my drive and making me tired, it's had the least aide effects out of like six I've already been through. I've been on it for about ten years, so I'm hesitant to mess with it. I become pretty much a non functioning mess without my medications, and without either the Spironolactone or hormonal birth control (the latter having horrible side effects so I had to switch) I get very painful and embarrassing cystic acne, which no other method has been able to touch, but the Spiro and BC were both miracle cures for it, making it go away almost 100%.

I will definitely try everything else mentioned, though! Thank you all so much! I hate that other people have to go through this, but it's comforting to know I'm not alone. ;_;
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Re: Medication and Drive/Orgasms: Can anything help?

Postby meganleigh » Wed Nov 16, 2016 6:18 pm

I also cannot go off my medication, as my conditions are basically chronic lifelong depression and anxiety, I was just born like this. I was actually offered shock therapy because of the severity. One of my meds is citalopram, which is an SSRI notorious for ruining sex drives, but since I've been on it (almost a decade) my sex drive has been through the roof.

Another med is quetiapine l, but before that was respiridone. I had awful side effects on respiridone, so it was replaced, and quetiapine does the same job, just without the side effects.

Basically I think it is worth talking to your doctor(s) about, because I think its very possible there may be meds out there that either you are "immune" to the side effects of just by chance, like me with citalopram, or there could be a med that is actually known to not have the side effects, like my quetiapine. I do know how terrible switching meds is, though I just wanted to let you know it may be an option!
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Re: Medication and Drive/Orgasms: Can anything help?

Postby Shadow hound » Thu Nov 17, 2016 3:40 am

When I was on anti-depressants or whatever they were, I still THOUGHT about sex and felt like I want it or need it but my body was like "eh...I don't know..maybe" and I would go for it anyways because I am used to sexual relief and all that but during the medication it was super hard to achieve orgasm or get pleasure. I did it probably only because I felt like the idea of sex is something that I needed. And I wanted to orgasm and enjoy, but it was near impossible, I was so numb and it was hard to get super excited.

I had sex with my boyfriend anyways even if I didn't feel like it much but also cause I also didn't feel like not feeling like it. So I just went with it xD I'm pretty easygoing so I wasn't like pressured into it it was my own choice just in case someone wonders about that. I told him that I probably won't be able to orgasm but I'm sure I'll like it anyways, which was also true, even if I didn't feel like having sex, after a while I got into it cause it was enjoyable, maybe not in the same way sex usually is, but being close and all that touching is nice. Sometimes I would get an orgasm after tons of clit rubbing for like 30 minutes(as opposed to..I don't know...40seconds I need to get an orgasm by hands if I need a fast one?) and I was so numb.Sooo numb. And the orgasm was like a letdown every time. I just started to focus more on other feelings than the orgasm. That helped.

Overall I feel like it was still needed in my case to keep toying and to keep having sex even when I wasn't feeling it like that because sexuality is a huge part of me and if you take that away then I feel so empty and even if my body said "nope..." my mind said "But I wanna ;_;". So, I think my advice is, keep doing it anyways but with zero expectations, do it just to give pleasure, not orgasm driven or waiting to get some super peak that explodes and fireworks fly but maybe just focus on doing anything that pleases you. For relaxation and self-love :)
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Re: Medication and Drive/Orgasms: Can anything help?

Postby Luxx » Thu Nov 17, 2016 5:20 am

You probably know already, but you absolutely cannot skip doses of an SSRI, which includes fluvoxamine, unless you've cleared things with your doctor. Even if you're taking a low dose the withdrawal is really unpleasant and can be physically dangerous. Luvox has a short half life and the withdrawal hits harder than some others too. Apparently this isn't always the case but I would not test things out just to see.

Here's an article on medical approaches to the sexual dysfunction caused by SSRIs, and it does suggest switching to or adding Wellbutrin (and Viagra), as well as lower doses and a "holiday" from the drugs (I still really, really wouldn't recommend this). Probably the best suggestion there is timing your dose to be after sex, or toying in your case, so your levels of the drug are lowest when you want to toy. It's at least worth trying.

Naltrexone can cause libido issues too, but can also induce erections and help with orgasms, at least anecdotally, so it's hard to tell. Spiro definitely does, it's an anti-androgen (reduces testosterone, in simple terms) to the point that trans women take it as a hormone blocker. Is it possible that you could move to a topical solution if not another medication? A cream would have fewer effects on your whole system, I think.

I dunno, personally SSRIs (200mg Zoloft) haven't tanked my interest in sex (physical or mental), just my ability to get off easily. I've mostly brute forced it with more powerful toys, TBQH, which might not be ideal. If you don't use a strong vibrator though, I do think it's worth trying. At least for me something high powered and rumbly/with deep vibrations works better than alternatives, and I've read other people on meds saying the same thing.
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Re: Medication and Drive/Orgasms: Can anything help?

Postby Dorito » Sat Nov 19, 2016 12:41 pm

Luxx wrote:You probably know already, but you absolutely cannot skip doses of an SSRI, which includes fluvoxamine, unless you've cleared things with your doctor. Even if you're taking a low dose the withdrawal is really unpleasant and can be physically dangerous. Luvox has a short half life and the withdrawal hits harder than some others too. Apparently this isn't always the case but I would not test things out just to see.

Here's an article on medical approaches to the sexual dysfunction caused by SSRIs, and it does suggest switching to or adding Wellbutrin (and Viagra), as well as lower doses and a "holiday" from the drugs (I still really, really wouldn't recommend this). Probably the best suggestion there is timing your dose to be after sex, or toying in your case, so your levels of the drug are lowest when you want to toy. It's at least worth trying.

Naltrexone can cause libido issues too, but can also induce erections and help with orgasms, at least anecdotally, so it's hard to tell. Spiro definitely does, it's an anti-androgen (reduces testosterone, in simple terms) to the point that trans women take it as a hormone blocker. Is it possible that you could move to a topical solution if not another medication? A cream would have fewer effects on your whole system, I think.

I dunno, personally SSRIs (200mg Zoloft) haven't tanked my interest in sex (physical or mental), just my ability to get off easily. I've mostly brute forced it with more powerful toys, TBQH, which might not be ideal. If you don't use a strong vibrator though, I do think it's worth trying. At least for me something high powered and rumbly/with deep vibrations works better than alternatives, and I've read other people on meds saying the same thing.


Yeah, I would never just go off it without talking to my doctor. I knew that it could have mental effects (when I accidental miss doses I'll notice I have some energy then a crash where I feel horrible mentally) but I never knew about the physical effects. Thank you for the article!

I don't think I can take viagra since I'm female, and I don't know any alternative for women unfortunately.. but if I was male I'd definitely have considered it. I wish there was a pill for women that worked. XD;

Unfortunately cream methods haven't worked for me, and would be very inconvenient/expensive because I get it over large parts of my body. I have clear skin for the first time in my life since I was like twelve after trying many creams and other treatments. It is working amazingly, but it's a shame it may be contributing to this.

I'm considering getting a Hitachi eventually since I've heard it's really strong. Maybe that will help.
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Re: Medication and Drive/Orgasms: Can anything help?

Postby Tempest » Sun Nov 20, 2016 11:37 am

Technically, Viagra does have the same effect on both men and women - it increases blood flow to the genital area. So in a pure sense, "Viagra for women" is just Viagra. The only reason it's not really that simple is that overall, men tend to report sexual problems from a performance standpoint while women tend to report sexual problems from a desire standpoint. Viagra won't fix a problem with desire, so it's generally assumed to not be helpful for women. But in your case, the desire is there, so looking to specifically treat the performance issue may be helpful for you. Now whether your doctor will dig that suggestion, I can't tell you, but if you haven't already tried this it may be helpful when talking to your doctor to emphasize that performance is where you're looking for help.
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