What's on your mind?

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Rainbow Dasher
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Re: What's on your mind?

Postby Rainbow Dasher » Wed Feb 24, 2016 4:01 pm

Goliogon wrote:So... I possibly had the worst panic attack I've ever had in my life last night after enduring a barrage of abuse in Facebook.

I was crying for hours, shaking, hyperventilating, and several times felt close to vomiting and even fainting. I had a horrible migraine the whole time and was grinding my teeth so hard that my jaws ached and I was unable to close my mouth without pain. At the time, I honestly just wanted to die. Only slept for a couple of hours from the exhaustion, then woke up and started panicking again.
...And all this over some fucking words on a screen. I hate myself for how damn sensitive I am, it's pathetic. :unamused:
Spending the whole day binge watching cartoons desperately trying to flush out the echoes of abuse that keep playing over and over in my head like a broken record.

I'm really sorry about posting this, but I have nowhere else to go. I've abandoned Facebook out of sheer hatred and fear of people (for the 4th time now) and kinda need to vent my frustration.
Again. :doh:


*hugs* I've been there many times before, too, and have deleted my FB more times than I can count. The trouble with FB, is that it's millions of people who all have access to this huge, open, very opinionated forum where they can say whatever they want, to whomever they want and all without consequence.

I'm sorry this happened, and I totally understand the "too sensitive" thing. My advice would be to stay away from that place for a long while, if not indefinitely. If you go back to it, set yourself to private. That way, no one can send you messages without you having to approve them, and I personally just delete the request without even looking at it, just in case.

My other advice, is to not change who you are. I used to be extremely sensitive. But after so many people telling me to grow the fuck up, grow a thicker skin, to stop being such a pussy, I ended up growing into a rage problem so fierce that I was a slave to severe hatred and anger for well over 10 years. It is no way to live. These days, I'm just indifferent altogether. A couple of months ago, I broke: I was crying and screaming: Do you not *get* how fucking dead I am inside? I am fucking dead thanks to this GD world and the people in it. I feel *nothing* anymore!

Don't *ever* let anyone tell you to stop being sensitive. It's who you are. Yes, it may be annoying to yourself at times, and other people may be conditioned by this world to think that sensitivity and feelings are awful, evil things that make a person bad or weak, but it's so far from the truth. Be who YOU are.

I would definitely give the FB platform a rest for now; stay where you are treated well and with respect. Personally, and from experience, people who are depressed don't do well on platforms like FB, because you have to restrict yourself to what you can do or even say, and almost every little thing coming at you, can really make your life hell for days on end, or even longer.

You are safe here. I'd choose this place over FB any day, regardless of the handful of bad experiences I've had here.

I wish this world wasn't so damn evil. I really, truly do. And people wonder why I write myself into novels, into a better world...
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HurricaneLane
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Re: What's on your mind?

Postby HurricaneLane » Wed Feb 24, 2016 4:05 pm

Goliogon wrote:
badkitty76 wrote:Sometimes i think if we were all furry in the world it would be a better place. But maybe that's naive, its a fantasy world afterall. Of course it would be better. Human nature can be so ugly sometimes.

*comforts Goligon*


*Purrs gently in appreciation*

Thank you! Mrrooow! :misc2:
And yeah, I get what you mean about furries; they're all such lovely, accepting people (yet the rest of the non-furry internet thinks we're literally the devil). I would love a world in which people just, y'know, get along! A world full of genuinely nice people! But eh, apparently that's too much to ask. :unamused:
...Still, I like to think that thousands of years in the future, we'll eventually 'cure' cruelty in humans! It's quite possible, IMO! I mean, in time, surely we'll just get over all the unnecessary hatred in the world and move on to more progressive goals? Probably not something I'll see in my lifetime, but it's a nice thought!
:smilenox:


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Re: What's on your mind?

Postby Sean » Wed Feb 24, 2016 4:10 pm

I need some ideas for an ASMR video that doesn't involve me talking.
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Goliogon
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Re: What's on your mind?

Postby Goliogon » Wed Feb 24, 2016 4:10 pm

Rainbow Dasher wrote:Many meaningful words. :words:


This... is honestly all so relatable. :sniffing:
I've had so many emotional, mental, physical and social issues throughout my life I can't possibly begin to elaborate on it all. I just...
*Lost for words*
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Rainbow Dasher
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Re: What's on your mind?

Postby Rainbow Dasher » Wed Feb 24, 2016 4:14 pm

Goliogon wrote:
Rainbow Dasher wrote:Many meaningful words. :words:


This... is honestly all so relatable. :sniffing:
I've had so many emotional, mental, physical and social issues throughout my life I can't possibly begin to elaborate on it all. I just...
*Lost for words*


*hugs and tries not to cry*
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Fire_Wolf
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Re: What's on your mind?

Postby Fire_Wolf » Wed Feb 24, 2016 4:34 pm

Goliogon wrote:
Think of it:
True world peace.

Beautiful thought, isn't it? Well, if a little optimistic, and highly unlikely in our day and time.
I know this is a really odd thing to think about when I'm struggling in life, but sometimes I imagine everything returning to equilibrium....


Not at all, it's kinda like with me at work. Being a custodian, especially when I've had a rough time lately. I imagine that the surfaces I'm cleaning are all my troubles and enemies. With the spray of my cleaner and wipe if my cloth they all return back to a time when everything was good and happy.

If only it worked irl. Hopefully I made since. It's hard for me sometimes to get my words to come together to read as what I mean. Lol
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Goliogon
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Re: What's on your mind?

Postby Goliogon » Wed Feb 24, 2016 4:52 pm

Fire_Wolf wrote:
Not at all, it's kinda like with me at work. Being a custodian, especially when I've had a rough time lately. I imagine that the surfaces I'm cleaning are all my troubles and enemies. With the spray of my cleaner and wipe if my cloth they all return back to a time when everything was good and happy.

If only it worked irl. Hopefully I made since. It's hard for me sometimes to get my words to come together to read as what I mean. Lol


Ah, beautiful metaphors... I have a serious passion for those. :misc2:
They're surprisingly effective mental images to help cope with things, and you can adapt them as you wish. The typical example is clouds drifting, depicting thoughts passing by, but heck, why not wipe away your troubles and enemies with surface cleaner? That's a very pleasing thought. :smilenox:

The mind and the imagination are very powerful tools, if harnessed to their full potential. It's nice seeing a greater meaning in everyday activities or in natural occurrences as little reminders that everything will be alright, or as a reflection of our own lives and the world around us.
Hopefully that... made sense? I too tend to go off in a somewhat unintelligible tangent sometimes! :nerdy:
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Re: What's on your mind?

Postby Amaranthe » Wed Feb 24, 2016 4:58 pm

Super late to this thread topic, but I'd still like to say to Goliogon and everyone else expressing their frustrations and sentiments right now: I'm sorry these terrible things are happening. As someone who also deals with similar stuff, know you aren't alone and please do rant when you need to, PM or otherwise! It can be so difficult to find a place where you feel comfortable to express yourself, either IRL or online, especially when there are bullies lurking around. I'm always so happy to see people being genuinely helpful and understanding towards one another around here. I know I complain a ton around here, but it's only because it's the only place I feel comfortable airing things out. So It's nice to see these positive interactions happening in light of a horrible situation. And if there's any way I can help someone, please let me know! I'm also happy to read ranty PMs :misc2:
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Re: What's on your mind?

Postby Goliogon » Wed Feb 24, 2016 5:14 pm

Amaranthe wrote:Super late to this thread topic, but I'd still like to say to Goliogon and everyone else expressing their frustrations and sentiments right now: I'm sorry these terrible things are happening. As someone who also deals with similar stuff, know you aren't alone and please do rant when you need to, PM or otherwise! It can be so difficult to find a place where you feel comfortable to express yourself, either IRL or online, especially when there are bullies lurking around. I'm always so happy to see people being genuinely helpful and understanding towards one another around here. I know I complain a ton around here, but it's only because it's the only place I feel comfortable airing things out. So It's nice to see these positive interactions happening in light of a horrible situation. And if there's any way I can help someone, please let me know! I'm also happy to read ranty PMs :misc2:


I'm so unbelievably happy to see so many understanding and compassionate people, it's really made my day and helped wipe away the dark clouds of anxiety and dread looming in my mind. Just knowing you're accepting of me expressing my negative emotions and experiences and are so eager to show genuine empathy lifts my spirits and fills me with strength I never knew I even had.

So... thank you, everyone, you have all been so kind and understanding and it means so much to me.
I love you all. You are such wonderful people. :misc2:
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Re: What's on your mind?

Postby HurricaneLane » Wed Feb 24, 2016 5:15 pm

:misc2: :misc2: :misc2: :misc2: :misc2: :misc2: :misc2: :misc2: :misc2: :misc2:
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Re: What's on your mind?

Postby Amaranthe » Wed Feb 24, 2016 5:25 pm

:misc3: :dukeretro:
:misc2: :misc2: :misc2:
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Re: What's on your mind?

Postby Kaiser » Wed Feb 24, 2016 5:32 pm

:misc1: :misc1: Dragon dong forums :misc1: :misc1:
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Re: What's on your mind?

Postby badkitty76 » Wed Feb 24, 2016 5:56 pm

*massive forum group hug*
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Re: What's on your mind?

Postby wolfstardobe » Wed Feb 24, 2016 8:15 pm

Image

*Hugs*
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Re: What's on your mind?

Postby Akanisen » Wed Feb 24, 2016 9:45 pm

Huuuuugs!!

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Re: What's on your mind?

Postby Kinky_Condesce » Wed Feb 24, 2016 10:13 pm

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Re: What's on your mind?

Postby Umbral » Wed Feb 24, 2016 10:27 pm

Goliogon wrote: :words:



Little late to the party but *hugs* I hate FB and barely ever use it... well actually stopped using it since I apparently changed my password into something so mysterious i have no clue on :mystery: . I hate cyber bullies and people who think that the only solution is to 'grow a thicker skin'. I like to turn it back on such people and ask them to grow a brain, or a conscience and to think before they type.

I hope you are okay and if you ever need to vent, I'm willing to listen. Everyone needs someone to talk to, plus this really does feel like a safe environ. People here are far, far less judgemental than the rest of the internet. Who would have guessed pretty dongs could bring people together. If only we could use our dongs for good and smack the crap out of negative people.... I'd buy a flared XL chance just to do that.
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Re: What's on your mind?

Postby Fire_Wolf » Wed Feb 24, 2016 10:47 pm

Well got ch3 to my fursona/story done. proof reading and editing. 3 hours, it turned out 5 pages, 2500+words for one chapter. I'm ready for bed.
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Re: What's on your mind?

Postby ffirebbird » Thu Feb 25, 2016 1:08 am

WOAH!Mounting a comeback! :cool:
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Re: What's on your mind?

Postby Fox-Titan » Thu Feb 25, 2016 1:43 am

WELL I SURE AS HELL DONT NEED SLEEP :buddy:

....Just woke up from a very, very too real dream. I dreamt that I was being left behind by my family and friends with no way to pursue them. No matter how much I screamed, cried and begged for them to come back, nothing would happen.

I ended up living out the rest of my life in a painful loneliness, and even died alone with no family or friends to be there for me, or to even bury me.

I'm terrified of being left alone, but this is beyond my worst fears. :crying:
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