Crackers the Cockatrice, Large, 5 (Medium Firm), Solid Blue, no suction cup or tube. I'm male.
Ordering, Shipping and Unboxing are pointless: I bought this at Rainfurrest. That said, buying at a convention was one of the smartest things I've ever done, because it allowed me to see and feel what Bad Dragon means by "large size" and "medium firm." I didn't get to pick the color, but I don't particularly care too much about the color. After hemming and hawing over the Cockatrice and the Karbos, and maybe getting an XL, I settled on a Cockatrice L/5.
The Toy: 9/10. I'm comparing the Cockatrice to my other favorite "big" toy, a Caterpillar from TSX toys. Both are in the "scary huge" category for mundanes. The Cockatrice's bulge at its widest is comparable to the Caterpillar down to the first flare; it's thicker, by tape measure, but because it's made of a squishier material, it's actually easier to use.
Use: 8/10. This Cockatrice is an incredibly friendly toy. Compared to the solid 8 firmness of my other toys, the Cockatrice, despite its broader girth, is actually easier to get in. There's also something about the silicone that Bad Dragon produces that makes it more slippery; most toys from other manufacturers, I use a condom to make the surface material tolerably slick. On the other hand, it does have that flexible base that makes aim difficult, so it took a few tries to get it in. The pattern seems to be that once the flared head is past the first sphincter, it stays put, and getting the rest in is just a matter of rocking back and forth in a meditative way.
Mounting The Cockatrice to one corner of the bedframe, so that it hangs out horizontally, seems to be the best way to go: it dangles just about perfectly. It's one of those things that makes me with I owned a fucking machine.
I don't have a lot of depth to me-- at least, I haven't found any toys that successfully sound out my depths. The Cockatrice L is a disappointment only in that it turned out to be a far friendlier and easier-to-use toy than the challenge I had hoped for. Still, that means for the miscellaneous nights when I have some time to myself, rare as those nights are these days, I have a new friend to look forward to.
I've been debating what to buy next. The Cockatrice XL looks to be one hell of a step up, so maybe the Karbos XL will be my next. I'd rather give my custom to a successful furry business than not, but I gotta tell you, an Elephant from Squarepeg is looking mighty tempting.